(Scroll down for lyrics…)
Res ipsa loquitur…
NEW! Live version of “Mitch, PLEASE!”, just voice and (synth)piano
With kind regards from the Mitch McConnell Retirement Committee (2021 update: now known as Progress Kentucky)…
Soundcloud:
YouTube:
Mitch, PLEASE!
You’d think you’d learned
After so many terms
A way for you to do more
But with poverty
Or even higher degrees
We’re still down here on the floor
On a TV ad you’re Kentucky tough
But the Bluegrass State gonna call your bluff
Mitch, please
Mitch, please
Mitch, please take your money and go
And you used to fight
Against cash in campaigns
You said it was for the best
Now you ask big business
To make it rain
And fatten up that ol’ war chest
We see you’re so good takin’ care of yourself
While you’re throwin’ down crumbs on the Commonwealth
Mitch, please
Mitch, please
Mitch, please take your money and go
For all the millionaires
From nearly everywhere
You’re the best friend they ever had
And you’ve made your way
To where the rich folks play
Thanks to your wife’s rich dad
While our Bluegrass keeps on getting’ worse
The only thing you care about’s a big fat purse
Mitch, please
Mitch, please
Mitch, please take your money and go
You had your chance to help our state advance
But the only Paris that you love is back in France
And it’s only big money that’ll make you dance
So groovy…
And even when you try to do something good
We get Russian mob money from a Moscow hood
You’re like a two-bit villain from a Hollywood
B-movie…
They had black lung disease
So they came to DC
To try and get them some help
But all you could find:
Two minutes of your time
Pretending that you care for their health
Well they weren’t well-dressed, so they weren’t so lucky
Now you’ve run out of time to help Kentucky
Mitch, please
Mitch, please
Mitch, please take your money and go
© 2020 Nate Orshan. All rights reserved.
(This is a retroactive post. I finally got around to publishing it on my site on 4/30/2021, but the music itself came out on 7/13/2020. In case you’re wondering.)